The Difference Between False Intuition and Real Fear
How to make the right decision?
Fear and intuition can disguise themselves as almost the same feeling. It’s super hard to tell the difference between the two when faced with a difficult decision. Just thinking about the outcome already gives you major anxiety. Is this a gut feeling trying to get your attention, or a past fear coming up?
Gut feelings
For example, you have met somebody who is showing a lot of interest in you (whether as a friend or a lover). You like them also, but something feels off. You can’t really put your finger on it, but there is something weird about this person. They have never done or said anything to you to make you feel this way, but you still can’t shake that feeling.
The more you get to know them, the weaker that initial feeling gets. It never completely goes away, but you manage to ignore it at some point. They are always super nice and helpful, and everybody else seems to like them. You forget about your gut feeling and continue being around this person.
It must have been something in yourself that is causing you to think this way, right?
Fear response
Second scenario: you dream of a different life and constantly work towards your new future. Then, you get the job offer abroad you always dreamed about. Suddenly, anxiety overtakes you. What if it’s not the right decision? What if something is wrong with the company? What if you hate your new life there?
Just thinking about the outcome almost gives you a panic attack. Surely, you should be happy about this opportunity, right? Your intuition must be telling you something very important to give you this much doubt?!
Your whole body reacts to it; you would rather not make any decision at all than have to deal with these crazy emotions.
Intuition is your soul trying to get your attention
The main way to tell the difference between fear and intuition is that fear is loaded with emotions. Your heart rate increases, you start sweating, you feel anxious, and maybe you even want to cry.
Intuition, on the other hand, feels peaceful and gentle. You just know it. It doesn’t matter whether you act upon it; the initial feeling always stays the same. You might try to rationalize it in your mind and push it away, because you haven’t learned to recognize it yet.
Either outcome of the decision will feel peaceful, but you are naturally more drawn to one side.
Intuition or fear?
The first example in this story is your intuition speaking. Even though you continue seeing this person, there is always this little voice inside telling you to be careful. It’s not a crazy loud yell telling you to stay away, but rather a gut feeling that you can’t trust this person fully.
And sure enough, months (or maybe years) later, your feeling gets confirmed. The person finally shows their true colors, and now other people start noticing it as well and pull away.
Your intuition was right from the start.
Your intuition is your soul trying to get your intention. It has learned important lessons during your life and feels it when something is off.
But it wants you to make your own decisions, so even when you make the ‘wrong’ decision, it still won’t start screaming at you. It just lingers there in the back of your head and will pop up now and then, until you see it for yourself.
Your fear is your ego speaking
The second example with the job offer is fear. A fear comes from an old memory and is often your ego speaking. Your ego has learned to be happy in its comfort zone, and it does everything to keep it that way. A big life decision — like moving to another country — is out of your comfort zone.
That is not what your ego wanted. So it creates a massive fear inside of you and tries to keep you from making the decision. Most major life decisions are a great way to let you grow, and your ego is threatened by that. It has created a nice and easy life for you, why change it around?!
Fear expresses itself by big emotions and bodily reactions.
You are literally preparing to run for your life, so your heart rate increases, your blood moves faster, and adrenaline kicks in. Your mind is telling your body it might die (like what would happen with a real fear), so you constantly feel like running away.
Not making the decision will ease your reaction, so you think that is the right way to handle.
But this fear comes from a past experience and is not real. You are not going to die when taking a job offer in another country. It might be useful to examine what scares you so much and get to the root of your fear. This is probably uncomfortable, but the same fear will keep coming up until you address it.
You can recognize fear because it often tells you that you can not do it. It makes you feel you are not good enough, and you are better off where you are right now.
Fear feels very insecure, and it doesn’t want to deal with that insecurity.
The difference between real fear and false intuition
Okay, so these examples might be pretty clear, but what about the emotions coming from real fear or false intuition? Let’s turn the previous examples around.
What if you meet a person and you immediately feel scared? The look they have in their eyes gives you chills and you get extremely nervous around them. This feels like fear, right? It is loaded with emotions so does that mean you shouldn’t act upon it?
But real fear is there for a reason as well.
This person might really have bad intentions, and your body is showing it. Like a deer being spied upon by a lion, you are ready to run for your life. If this is the case, you can’t push away the fear no matter what you try. If you continue seeing this person, the fear might show up in your dreams as well.
If you are still not sure whether it’s an irrational fear, try staying away from them for a while and see how you feel. Does the fear immediately come back just when you see this person? Or do a lot of people have this same effect on you?
If you have trust issues, you probably feel this type of fear around various people. That would be a sign you should work on being able to trust others.
But if just that one particular person causes it, there might be a real fear behind it. Some people are really going to harm you, so your fear is real.
What about false intuition?
Let’s look at the second example for that. You get the job, but a little voice keeps telling you that you are going to fail. You see signs everywhere that you shouldn’t pursue it (like airplane crashes, fires in the country you are supposed to move to, or suddenly meeting the love of your life in your hometown).
You could think that this is your intuition telling you something, but you are not sure how to take it. You really want the job, though, and this is what you have been working towards for years. So you push away your ‘intuition’ and decide to take it anyway.
It turns out to be great, and your life has changed for the better.
What about that ‘intuitive’ feeling that you had initially? Well, sometimes a false intuition kicks in to test you. Is this really what you want? Are you sure you are making the right move? Let’s see how strong you really are in pursuing your dreams!
This often happens when you can expect difficulties on the way, but you still have to stay true to your purpose. After all, your soul already made the decision to continue with it, so this way, you are prepared when doubt kicks in.
If you decide to be influenced by your false intuition (and not take the job), you probably weren’t ready for the real challenge. Any downfall on the way would have made you doubt your decision, which makes it so easy to regret it and turn back.
Your false intuition is testing you to keep you from choosing the right path, because it might be the wrong timing.
What’s meant for you will always come
One final tool that could help you with trusting your intuition, is being in the present moment. How do you feel about the outcome of the decision right now? Don’t think about what it might do to you in the future, or what happened to you in the past. Tune into your feeling about it now.
Is the person you are doubting about a welcome addition in your life now? Can you learn a lot from them without expecting them to be friends or lovers forever? Then why not continue seeing them? Your intuition will tell you what you need to do at the moment you really need to do it.
How does the potential job make you feel in this present moment? Do you feel proud of yourself? Is there a slight excitement about your new life waiting for you? Then why not take the leap and go for it? You will see soon enough if it was really something to be scared of.
If you really can’t define the difference between fear and intuition, just know that you can never make the wrong decision. Every decision is the right decision, and what is meant for you will come your way eventually.
And finally, whatever you choose, you will always learn from it. Whether it is regret that overtakes you, or the ultimate relief that you finally made the decision, be open to all the possibilities and just flow with the Universe.